i permit you to call me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
