he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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