Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
