Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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