Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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