Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
