Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
