worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
