If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize