I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
