You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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