It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
