honey bunches of taint.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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