dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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