I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
