She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
