I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Randomize