David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
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