Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
