i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
