This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
