How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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