I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize