You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
