Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
