Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
