Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
