I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
