Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
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