I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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