your room smells of hookers.
And success
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
