i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
