Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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