Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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