Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
