You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
