she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
