I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
