I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
