Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize