In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize