How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
this will be a night to untag.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
There's always time for handjobs
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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