Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
