how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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