we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
