How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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