Is it normal to miss your booty call?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Operation Purity has been aborted
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
