At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Randomize
