Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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