i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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